Sunday, November 8, 2015

I have loved you selfishly 
for the ways I could not see
beyond what I had seen before
in the ways I begged for blue
then chose to call those colours
by other names

I have loved you selfishly
in the ways that I have grown
and had to heal myself
and ask to many times
for the space to make amends

I have loved you selfishly
in that there is no balancing now
that I have received
more than what was given
and still believed that it was
just the other way

and now when all goes fragile
and I stand holding all these gifts
I wish that I could trade them
for the chance to have known 
what love was 
when love was there
and all I had to do was see

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