some of us
greet the dawn
from the backside of the day
homesick for the stars
we got calibrated
to just turn out that way
so let us meet
to sing the sky awake
with backwards lullabies
to bring the light
into to the sky
not in the 9-5
between domestic prisons
of four walls
that chain us to the floor
but out the open door
and somewhere beyond
the just beyond
where time is of no matter
from the backside of the day
we who dance in darkness
because it is our fate
we forever reaching
toward the growing light
walking in reverse
of fading with the night
the wormhole ancient chorus
the homeless cosmic tribe
us orphans of the stars
who rest when sun returns
then fill the yearning
to belong
where dreams ignite
to burn

I name today
forgiveness day
there must have been
some kind of hurt
to make you see me
in that way
and nothing ever healed
by what we take away
except the hurt
except misunderstanding
forgiveness
for the giving
even if it ain't our debt to pay
but then I also owed you too
in ways I can't set straight
and I'll always be
a galaxy away
a stranger
because you wanted it like that
but I'm the skin
and then the centre
of the universe of me
maybe too far
for any astronaut to reach
but a sun that burns
at the apex
of everything that's me
and you are like that too
but still so much forgetting
the light was never lost
by what we give away
so I wish you do discover
eclipses you can see
without ever going blind
and for you I give
the only thing
you might ever take away
and name this sunrise to the dusk
for your forgiveness day

surreal life

my birth canal
was a rabbit hole
I fell a long way down
sometimes I'm too big
sometimes too small
but never quite the size
of where I ought to be
so I skipped class
to read the deeper books
and stole hours from the day
to chase down canvas dressed in paint
for the medicine it made
and sometimes I look out
into the world
like Jodo or Marquez
hijacked the train of thought
inside my head
and the surreal is all
that's really real
perspective is the strangest thing
because sometimes
the things that I see clearly
don't see me in return
and yet there are creations
who salsa in between
the then and then the future
to reach the shifting now
to touch down for a moment
the inspiration on the head
it was the garden that told me
you have to know
when you are dead
before you germinate
to rise again
and evolution is for the dying
as much as for the growth
and the flower sees the underneath
but often not the height
unless it's looking down
and all of us are just like that
sometimes too big
sometimes too small
and nothing has a point at all
least of all these words
but size is quite irrelevant
to any kind of light
when it's made up its mind
to lose all of perspective
and only just
to shine

resilience is more useful
than the being optimistic
I got concussed
from the hierarchy
of love
when I want it
anarchistic
and complex
and beyond my understanding

but in the wide open
of the spaces
someone always
has to bring the pen
to write the propaganda in

and I am just the kind
who needs to find
my balance
in destabilizing
the something always said
about the faults of me
when the first step to being free
is emancipating
from the concept
of naming or being named
with shame

this is an evolution
so fuck the system
of the rules
to tell you what you gotta do
when we only gotta shine
to illuminate the path
to find our better way

not plugging in
to shame today
for the hope that fate
might be my benefactor
like positivity
over clarity
is some kind of currency
I can trade

and you're gonna get concussed
if you don't stand in line
waiting to receive
what was taken
to begin
but I got anarchy within
and a wicked tuck n roll

this world that spirals around me
I'm bigger on the inside
folding and unfolding
in universes
the eyes can't see
in dreams
and in journeys
that transcend the borders
of flesh
the definitions of mind
bringing eclipses
of spirits of the sky
and ancestors
emerging from the heart
and the only sense
is that no sense
is the clarity of all
from every fall
and hit the ground
this rising to transcend
the heights I knew before
breaking
to break free
and be more than
what has been confined
within the mind
and the illusions of the world
bigger on the inside
than comprehension
can perceive
and somewhere deep inside
a galaxy of free
spiralling in me

I wanted their warmth
on the top of my head
like sunshine pushing
through the clouds

your forever broken hands
fractured by the rules
and the ruler
of the rule of the come-to-colonize

your forever broken hands
that grew like trees
always facing toward the ground
always prepared
to fall

forever broken hands
with fingers that could only clasp
around fishing poles
and garage sale ten speed bikes
and tits
and bottles of Black Label Beer
and bibles
and keys for spam
but never me
never grasp the concept
of what a daughter was

your forever broken hands
that pointed a crooked path
to my forever broken heart

I followed those hands
to the shattered places
you left behind
and pried them open wide
lost myself inside
along the forever broken path

and found my medicine
weeping out