I was melting down
my love
but you were not ashamed for me
you only told me fire is the path to free
so I had to let it burn
and helpless turns to power
when you see it for a cycle
that has to find an end

but I was melting down 
my love
and unsure I could survive
if not already dead
when I was only half way there
which is worse than either way
and because I could not live
you taught me how to die by flame

I was melting down 
my love
the core of my reactor
moving toward complete collapse 
and my heart became 
the method of contamination 
for even you
who was born of star
and intimate with radiation

I was melting down
my love
my bones smouldered into ash
with nothing left to be
and you are now a star again
living by the fire
and I rose from your flames
to remake myself of flesh and blood
with something wild and raging...

...but also stable

at my core

¿Sabes bailar casino?

he asked

and si

of course I do

or did before the stage lights dimmed

for all of us

around the world

but sabes sus palabras

no son dulces como

when you said 

sé cómo te encanta 

salsa en el calor 

de las noches de verano

when there was still a platform

for you to say

such things

to fools

so tell me what’s to do

with parasites 

who feed on light

but hide myself inside the dark

to not acquire the taste 

for bastante bonitos caníbales

to not become

depredador

si, there is advantage

that comes with elevation

if you forget the weakness 

of the platform

in relation 

to the height 

and just how far

it has been raised

but solo quiero salsa

somewhere deep inside the truth

con mis pies

against the earth

and en la noche

with a little of your light

cerca de mi corazón

I got no poetry today
just fully engaged in adult type shit
and a pandemic
and a lot of matriarchal loss
and you are silent also
so I figure maybe you are like me too
but in a different way
so I wrote this like a poem
just to say I think of you
and in this manic world
no matter where you go
you are not alone
we were made for these times
even if they hurt
here’s to evolution and dancing
even when it feels like we’ll be crippled
from the effort

maybe I’ll see you on the other side

ring all the bells of Maidan
at five in the afternoon
in Tiananmen Square

bring traffic cones
and umbrellas

and pots

they’re shooting out the eyes
of the eyes of the world
to take our depth perception
and make us colourblind

to deceive us that all lives matter
and then convince us
that the ones who starve
are the ones who refused to eat

when the table never had a seat
for Iyad and for George
for Colton and Miroslav

but all the angry men with flags
will not unboil the kettle
when the steam escapes their grasp

even when they’ve reduced 

Chilean churches down to ash
and have our throats between their hands
until we cry out Mother we can’t breathe!

even then their rifles won’t pluck out the sight
of this band of global comrades
who use their hearts to see

the tears cried
with your departure
fill the river that carries you home
your journey will be swift

hummingbird
rising morning star
wings honoured with scars
angel of the Black Madonna
and the White Buffalo Calf
but also my sister
where our feet touched the earth
holy singing woman
dancing woman
firefly in the dark
toss your head back when you laughed
sister
hugged you wholly
sister
painting dreams
sister
picking sage
sister
shining rock
sister
raging for life and beauty and harmony
sister
mother
sister
sister of the river and all things wild
I will send my breath to you
each time I face the east

my friend you know
soldiers discriminate
on where they’ll feel regret
but I regret I’ve always gone too far
and never far enough
so I look at your picture from time to time
when I’m not one for sentiment
and wish that I had just been still
to know you
when you were mine to know
and that I could have been this me
that I am now
but then I never would have known
how far it was
that someone else could go
for me
if I had been this me
and sometimes when we don’t go
quite far enough
that’s the furthest we can go
and the greatest thing that we can give
and I wouldn’t have known
that I could go that far
if I didn’t do that for you
when I didn’t go far enough

you were never mine to miss
but I miss you
like tobacco and wine
and everything that reminds me
of the infinite space
between earth and sky
and we find each other
every time
even if the silence doesn’t break
this time
but breaks me just a little
with what I cannot have
but leaves me raging hard for joy
like Morse Code or semaphore
made of a life
to tell you
you are loved

Shnurov is hoarding cat food
and last night I dreamed
a vampire
and how the library
at Alexandria really burned
did you see it too
imagine that kinda guilt
but everyone is dreaming wildly
so why should I be any different
when I am like this
all the time
and I’m getting claustrophobic
I think it’s a conspiracy of pet hair
that’s trying to choke me out
and I should have requested
a Dyson
the last time I had anyone to ask
for birthday gifts
but at least I have a dog
and not a cat
and it knows to shit outside

Domovoi is raging
but I’ve got a mind like a taranta
and all this chaos
is birthing something
in ever escalating spirals
until it winds itself to ashes
and then ignites again
but a girl can’t have a stable house
when she lives on
chicken legs
and yet there’s so much fire
to keep an old god warm

we always think that we’ll have time
until we have nothing but time
to wait for the next time

remember the last time
one more time

this time
in time
out of time
no time

one time

another time
and I have only now

I don’t know much about love
but I want to read you stories
about moonlight and bullets
and rainfalls that comfort
and sunshine that stings

and take long walks
with each of the thoughts
inside your head

and build alters and monuments
and idols
for each of the journeys your heart
has made

transform this flesh
into a sacred place
where all the people
you are
will be
have ever been
can meet to tell their tales
of cowardice and bravery
about the teeth of wolves
and the skin of lambs

expand this cage of ribs
so exponentially
you can be all the contradictions
that you were ever born to be

I’ll give new name to those you christened shame

In a time of crisis, the peoples of the world must rush to get to know each other. José Martí

I wanted to write you
an apocalyptic poem
or maybe only read you
echoes of resurrection from Martí

to awaken your ancient soul
and toss it flowers
in the sea
with incantations to remind you
you are the embodiment
of all the times that you have drowned
just to prove there is no death

but I’m backed
against the mountains
with only this dried and diverted river
at my feet

these feet that pray such sterile prayers
as to dance to give the reason
to the music of your heart
while the silence sits
between all men

but you are far away
where the empire falls
onto its knees

and there is nothing left
between us
not the miles nor the constructions
nor any barriers we have conjured
to keep us in our place

and tonight when I will sing you
how men are like the stars
and amor cuerdo no es amor
these snowdrops will ignite
from the sea
of your subconscious dreams

I heard there is no pain
on the other side of the moon
I heard it from a star
and I heard that it’s OK
to fake your graces
and forgiveness too
if you’re running short on time
because the universe tallies
only in intentions
and every heart will settle up
as soon as it learns how
so for now this is separate ways
and we’ll know better when we meet again
but life is hard and hurts a lot
and we do what we have to to survive
until we don’t
but I have heard there isn’t pain
out there on the other side
so I hope I catch you in that place
where our wounds can fill with light

my voice was stolen by a bird
who flew it halfway
round the world
and left me lost so now I’m here
but mostly really gone
without the words
to hide the lbs
without the words
to hide the years
and wear the mask
of who I am
when I was her
who you once knew

but then today while sharing cake
with the greatest Jedi I have known
he said that it was not
the imperfections
of my own
but rather with his flaws
that mired us in the dark
though I will still assert
the faultiness was mine
because we all crave a master
to punish us for who we are
and you just might be seeking
to have your penance too
for who it is
that you have been
and not to take acceptance
for exactly where you go

but who is here among us
who is looking to be loved
and still be left as free
if we are getting real
and speaking with our truth
but actually I have wanted
to bring your body here
except that now I’m gone
and you are halfway round the world
where maybe you can hear
a birdie in your ear
somewhere that isn’t here
but a thousand miles out there
and know it is my song
to hold you where you are
while I’ll be staying gone
with something of me near

the egg is still ticking
a secret in my hand
because this has been the always
we tore into reality
when we were birthed together here
covered in dream and colour
and I am homesick now
for the caves
we carved inside this world
to engineer universes
made of imagination and of light
and I wait like a widow
who expects no lover
to return
while you best like
how quickly ripe the fruit
of synthetic synergy
and all of it a desperation
to find those fluid worlds
where thought and creation
could stretch but not divide
like the days when we were hungry
but always fed
unlike this time
when we are fed
but our hungers go unfilled
and I look nothing like
the half the key that you forgot
you’d need to take us home
and I forget sometimes
that you are here at all
but it has always been
and so it will be still
when imagination can remember
the way we cocreate
infinitude in realms
we hide inside our hands